1/3/2021

 It's 2021 and on the first of January and had asked my husband if he had any goals for the new year.  He didn't.  OK.  That conversation didn't really go anywhere.  Then he asked me the same thing and one of the things I said was to finish my book.  I've been working on it for nearly 15 years, off and on and I think this year I finish it.  

So yesterday i sat down to write and I actually wrote.  I connected some character's stories, connected the past to the present.  I do think I need more of why Suzie is the way she is.  She was so joyful and innocent when she was young.  And now she is closed off and jaded.  I need to paint the picture of when it changed.

And I also need to get the story of my main character out.  Her story has been put on hold since I started developing Suzie and her men.  But Cal, Cal was going places.  And a broken heart broke it all.  

Unrequited love has taken over this story.  But isn't that what life is all about?  LOVE.  How it breaks us, builds us back up, guard us, and opens us?  I think so.  This story was originally about Cal and the people she meets on a journey to discover herself.  But I think it's becoming more of how love changes a person.  

Suzie, the love of Alfred, Tristan, and now Odin changes her.

Cal, the love she develops for her own self is what makes her grow in this story.  She loved what she did and where her life was headed but she never really took into account that if all of that fell apart, she would have only herself to love.  And now, here she is.  In a town where no one knows her, and she is learning by watching others that she can be loved.  She can be the one to love herself.

Gosh, a few hours later and reading that back it sounds so corny.  Meh.  Whatever.  I'm writing it anyway.  It'll get there.  The story will show itself.